It's No Laughing Matter, Mr. Spock

As an INTJ, we get compared to that most worthy of Vulcans, Mr. Spock. It's an honor really. Some people think this means we are cold and dull, lacking the ability to laugh, but this is far from the truth. Allow me to share with you a taste of Vulcan humor, to prove that rational beings can have fun too:

We find humor in the truly funny, the jokes that make sense and have (for us) a logically humorous meaning.

Play on words is one of the NT's delights... we are masters of the pun, creative with double meanings, and find delight in well phrased ambiguity.

Remember, you can always laugh with your Vulcan, but don't laugh at your Vulcan... or you'll find yourself in a lot of tribble.

What Was I Saying?

When I first saw the above illustration, I laughed at the truth of it... and then I sighed. Because it's true. When I communicate, I use one of two portions of my brain. One is the 'social auto-pilot' that gets me through most interaction without too much fuss. I can hold a five to ten minute conversation without putting too much forethought into it, thus moving from person to person, saying essentially the same thing (which is really nothing), and neither of us is the wiser for it. In the second communication portion of my brain, I am holding a running conversation with myself & I am analyzing and preparing for the off chance that a deeper conversation might be forthcoming. You see, I hate being unprepared, and having unprepared thoughts is a calamity for me. If I know I am going to see someone that I want to have a meaningful conversation with, I have to mentally rehearse that conversation in my mind beforehand, so that I am prepared for the different avenues it might take. The laughable (yes, I laugh at myself over this) part is that, no matter how many scenarios I can go through, and no matter how many variables I come up with, there is an inevitable law of nature that says that my conversation will never go as rehearsed. 

I used to allow this to frustrate me - I would lose sleep analyzing exactly why my conversations didn't go as planned. I'm not sure what point it changed, but now I simply rehearse conversations out of habit and simply have fun seeing how far from the mark it is from the actual interaction. Was that over explaining? I tend to second guess myself at that... Usually my listener's glazed over look is an indication that I have begun inserting unnecessary details into my dialogue. But I can't see your expression, so bear with me. :)

Being totally inarticulate - I find it interesting that this trait is often found among introverts, but also I believe highly in Rational types. Not that their speech itself is slurred or incomprehensible, but the abrupt way we present information tends to confuse anyone who cannot keep up with our mental process. When you have a conversation with a Rational, if it has some meaning or puzzle to it, that conversation will run in the background of their mind until the next time they have a chance to renew the subject with you. So, days can pass, you move on (and most likely even forget), and then your NT friend will bring that conversation up to you as if it happened seconds ago, even starting in the middle of the context, picking up right where you left off. Point in case: I had a conversation in the car with my Mom about how excited I was because this blog has been read by people from across the globe - five countries, to be exact. I could only remember four of them at the time, so the next day while we were fixing lunch, the name of the fifth country occurred to me & I simply looked at her & said, "Germany. That was the other one." (With any other person I do try to give context before launching forward, but she has figured out my tendency to overlap subjects & fills in the gaps accordingly.)

I'm going to do a post in the future about psychological traits in the types and how it tends to manifest itself in healthy or unhealthy ways, but for now - take this information and try to see it in action in your daily life, while you are at work or with friends. Do you know someone who communicates in this way? Does it frustrate you? Perhaps they are not meaning to confuse you, they simply need to be reminded that you do not live in their brain with them, so you need them to back up to a common point and move forward. Also try to realize that for some people, it takes a lot of guts & mental planning for them to have a conversation, so make sure you listen! Listening is the key to consideration - and it just might be the encouragement someone needs today!

Wheel Of Fortune, Personality Style

Ok folks, I am back! Since I didn't write a post yesterday, I'm going to do double today.

Ever wondered why some people "bring the party"? And others you don't even notice when they are around? Why some people never shut up... or others clam up? All of this is part of our individual patterns of personality, or type. Lots of people think that by labeling people by type, we are putting them in a box, or simply writing them off, but it's not true. The people who get into personality typing are more fascinated that there are so many ways people can handle things, such as social situations, personal relationships, even job placements. It is learning how you react to things, how your friends react to things, and how to bridge the gap that might be keeping you from some great opportunities. 

I was introduced to personality typing through the book Please Understand Me II by David Keirsey. I was pleased with how straightforward and "un-boring" it was. I was also pleased that most of his philosophy was in line with my Christian worldview, so I didn't have to dig through all the psychobabble to find basic facts. His theory is based on the MBTI, and it divides people into four categories, sixteen subcategories. It helps you decide whether you are introverted/extroverted, how you handle decisions, what you do under stress, and how you perceive the world around you. I find the whole thing amazing, but if it's not your cup of tea, I understand that too. Someone I am close to is really not into it, and that's ok - because I understand that most people with that personality are a little leery of having people analyze them.

For myself, I read the book when I was fourteen and it changed my whole life. I finally realized that I was not a freak, that it was ok to be exhausted after spending time with people, and that I have a very particular way of dealing with problems. I also began to understand how I needed to interact with the people around me so that they would realize that I valued them and how to communicate with them in a way that was productive and pleasant for both of us.

I am an INTJ Rational (I have this irresistible urge to write 'And I sea food differently.' Thanks, Red Lobster.) I will be writing posts occasionally about personality, Rationals, and also have a little fun with how we perceive the stereotypes. However, let's not lose sight of the fact, that while we are all human, and our personalities do follow one of four patterns, every single one of us is different. Every person has a distinct set of idiosyncrasies, and that is what makes us unique - each life is valuable!  

If you would like to take the free online personality type test, click here (11/15 I changed the link to a more specific test). It is a much shorter version than the one in the book, but it should give you a general idea of your type. If you do, please comment & let me know what your type is! If possible, I will try to write a post about your type, or direct you to someone who has written one (probably better than I can!). You can also explore the Keirsey website for a lot of information and articles about your type specifically. 

Until next time!